Overreact much?

I’m home, we’re all fine. Once my son practically pushed me out the door because I DARED to get in front of the TV (turned on as a distraction tactic – it totally worked), I knew things probably wouldn’t be as bad as I painted them. I did NOT cry on the plane as I’d already done all of my crying the day before. Ha! Got that out of the way.

The flight was fine, airport transportation was a little bit of a nightmare, but it all worked out eventually. Had a mostly good time, except for that one incident which I will tell you about and link to soon.

And? I didn’t whine and moan about my son as much as I thought I would. I went back to being just me for a while, doing what I wanted when I wanted. Laughing, eating out, staying up all hours (and paying for it with EXHAUSTION the next day). Being me. And realizing I’ve been obsessing way too much.

I went to the pier after the conference was over. Sat and watched the boats and water. Wrote and sketched a little. Enjoyed my time alone, yet also wished my family could be with me to enjoy it. And it was a nice feeling. No guilt, no remorse. Just wanting to share some fun.

Some days things are easier than others. I’m still trying to learn some balance, and I might be getting a tiny bit better at it. We’ll see. I re-learned some things while I was gone. Things I needed desperately.

I needed to find the Becky that was around before the kid. She’ll never be back wholly. But it’s nice to remember that bits of her still lurk and it’s okay to channel her once in a while. In fact, it’s NEEDED for my sanity.

I might talk about the conference, although I’m sure so many of you are SICK and TIRED of all of the con talk. But I need to write it for me. Process what I saw and felt. And just remember it a little bit.

It’s good to be back. Really.

Category: babbling, me, me, me
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