Archive for » June, 2004 «

didja miss me?

i forgot to mention that i was out of town fri – mon. i’m back now & have lots to tell when i have time.
i got to go to the harley mecca. can you guess where i was?

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figures

oh sure. now that i finally have gmail, no one wants my invitations.
ain’t that how it goes?

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shoes! and babies!

can you stretch leather shoes by wearing them in the shower? will it ruin them? is my friend pulling my foot?
oh, and also? i got to hold a five week old baby. and smell her head! for an hour! and now i can’t lift my arms. ow!

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addiction

i am really craving a soda right now. i think i need to cut it out of my diet completely – it’s just empty calories with no nutritional value.
hey, that could be my new slogan! paradigm shifts – empty calories with no nutritional value.

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tuna helper?

i just came home from visiting j @ the boat. oh, and i returned with about 50 pounds of albacore tuna. and i spent about an hour & a half vacuum packing it.
wow.
anyone local want some very fresh tuna?
in other news, i know i’ve been away for far too long. i have some things to say about my trip to see grandma – but the story isn’t quite forthcoming. it’s getting there, but it’s not quite ready for the light of day.
but anyway, i’m okay. she’s okay, for now.

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hiatus

going to see grandma. back tuesday or so.

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hoping like hell

grandma is ok for now; she’s stable and speaking with everyone. but she’s not ready to go home yet. and she has a lot of muscle damage. i’m making plans to go next week & hoping like hell that it works out. she has maybe six months if she even makes it out of the hospital. i’ve never been terribly close to her. but she’s family. and i want to show my mom that i’m there for her, to let her know i care. this is her mom, for pete’s sake. that’s not a small thing.
j got home at o’dark thirty. today’s his birthday. happy birthday, sweetie.
i’ve been fighting a migraine off & on since yesterday. stress, much?
the kiddo made drum major for next year. proud of her (but hoping like hell she can manage her homework better during junior year).
best friend’s kid getting teased a lot. and it started because a teacher called him a name – and now the kids think it’s okay to continue said torture. he hasn’t wanted to go to school for the past three months. the homeroom teacher hasn’t addressed it in the classroom, telling the kids it’s unacceptable to use those names. oh, and one of the troublemakers doesn’t really get in trouble because he has “low self esteem” – how does that make it right for him to make others feel bad?! whatever happened to putting a stop to shit like this? my teachers would have talked to the entire class, telling us they know what’s going on and to stop it. and they would have meant it. these schools have zero tolerance policies where a kid can’t say boo or have tylenol. where’s the teacher’s accountability for calling a kid a name during class and then letting the rest of the kids call him names for THREE MONTHS? why hasn’t the fucking principal talked to this teacher and made him apologize in front of the class? a kid would have to apologize in front of everyone. what’s different for the adult? shouldn’t they set the example? i thought they were supposed to create a safe environment for kids to learn. look, everyone gets teased. but all day, every day? he goes to school at the last possible moment, eats at the last moment, and has completely adjusted his schedule to avoid these people. it’s affecting him at home, everywhere. it’s bordering on torture. and get this, the homeroom teacher has been asking my friend what was wrong at home. turns out it’s something at school. under HER nose. she tried to make my friend feel like a bad mother (which she’s not). and it was happening on HER watch. some educator she is. bitch. i’m hoping like hell that he can make it three more days and enjoy his summer – he is going to italy for a few weeks with a close friend of the family. the kid needs a break.

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duck!

i keep hearing helicopters. i feel like i’m on m*a*s*h.
update: they’re media and there was a bus crash (overturned) on the 5. injuries, but no fatalities. i hope the kids are going to be okay.

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hey you

psst. hey you. in the silver vw. FUCK YOU.

more…

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so i sit here

my grandma had a massive heart attack and is in ICU right now. she’s about 12 hours away from here. i don’t know what to do. there’s not a lot i can do even if i go. mom & dad tell me i should wait until they get down there & they’ll call me & let me know what’s going on.
in some ways, i just want to go. i don’t think she’ll make it through this one. she’s old and has lived a long life. over the past few years she has had an increasing number of health problems. it probably won’t be much longer.
here’s the rub & i feel pretty damn guilty about it: j’s going to be home for a week starting wednesday. if i leave, i won’t get a chance to see much of him for five months. i miss him terribly. on top of that, i have a busy week and don’t see how i can really get away. next week, maybe. this week i can’t.
so i feel guilty. she’s my only grandparent. my mom’s mom. i would rather see her alive than go to a funeral.
so i sit here, unable to sleep, puffy eyes, runny nose, full of guilt for having obligations that i think i need to keep. for not being there even though i can’t really do anything but let her know i’m there. and that – in spite our many differences over the years – i love her. she’s family & nothing, not even our stubborness, will ever change that.
so i sit here …

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